Psychopath and Narcissist Survivors Support Group

Raspberries · Guest

Is it a good idea in these situations to set up an online communication blog, to post about our childs life at preschool, weekend activities and photos?. Or would it make things worse?.

pinkybubbles · Guest

there are too many perverts in life and on the net to even consider doing this.

Raspberries · Guest

pinkybubbles · Guest

Hackers?

lemondroppr · Joined: 10 Feb 2007 Posts: 1416

Who or what would this be for Rasp? What do you have in mind?

Lukky · Site Admin Joined: 11 Feb 2007 Posts: 2429

Hey Raspberry.... I think its a wonderful idea to share our experiences with our kids..... perhaps not photos as this is quite a sencitive forum and many may not be willing to share those......
I am wondering if this thread might be better in the anything goes section..... It is less public there and I think it would recieve more responce there as feel sure we all have stories to share and some just perhaps get a little nervous in this area...... its a great idea I think!!!....

Anyway just a thought and ask one of the Managers if you agree and they are able to move it for you if would like that......

Lots of Hugs and awesome idea
Lukky
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'The Best reaction is no reaction'

Raspberries · Guest

Óh I should have explained!. It would be a private blog set up by me so that the ex could see what was happening in our son's life without me having to talk to him directly..

There have been a few posts about this on an Australian site I go to, but none involve domestic violence and supervised visits...

Lukky · Site Admin Joined: 11 Feb 2007 Posts: 2429

Ohhhhhh now I get ya...... I wasnt quite sure what you wanted either Raspberry......I thought you wanted a thread on here for everyone ....

Well In my opinion I guess you have to ask yourself if it is worth your while???
Is he truly and genuinely interested in the kids lives?? Or does he just use them to get to you?? Sadly thats the case with these people sometimes!!! Many of them arnt capable of love.....

In saying that..... it depends on where you are and what the court is telling you, you have to do....... If you are wanting to do this to maintain less Contact... then maybe it might be helpful to have an independant person sort some means of giving him these updates......
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'The Best reaction is no reaction'

Raspberries · Guest

No I don't think he gives a stuff about our son, he hasn't rung him at all like he said he would. But I would be doing it so that at least it shows i'm trying to involve him in our son's life... especially if it goes to court.

Lukky · Site Admin Joined: 11 Feb 2007 Posts: 2429

I recommend talking to your Lawyer Raspberries....... If he hasnt bothered to take much interest,,,,, then why bother using your precious energy doing this....... save it for you..... cause your important ...

At the end of the day no matter what you do it will never be enough!!!
I think your time would be better spent clearly documenting what he hasnt done... Like a daily itinery of the fact he hasnt called,,, didnt follow through on some plan he had with your son... ect
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'The Best reaction is no reaction'

pinkybubbles · Guest

I agree with Lukky that your energies would be better spent elsewhere- I have a box of special things I keep to show my daughter when she is older- first clothes and shoes she wore- news papers with special events- certificates shes achieved at school and swimming etc etc

to put information on the net however secure you are not going to completely eliminate the risk of perverts hacking the system-

documenting the broken promises of contact your ex makes is much better use- for one it can be used as evidence for your lawyer and the courts- 2 it can be shown to your son at a time he is ready to understand- in the mean time if your son is asking after his father it is best to reassure him he is loved by his father but hes too busy working etc at the moment- also he is very special to you and loved very much and reassure you will always be there.

survivormomoftwo · Joined: 20 Feb 2007 Posts: 311 Location: USA

Ditto on pinky......if you think about what will be most important to your son when he is an adult, will it be that you created a full life for you and he or will it be about his dad? These kids are going to know the truth eventually....
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"The quality of your life is determined by the quality of people in your life."

H. Jackson Brown

lemondroppr · Joined: 10 Feb 2007 Posts: 1416

Instead of expending all that energy on a blog and maintaining it, I suggest you spend the energy on yourself and your son. You will NEVER prove to the P what a good mother you are no matter what you do to "prove it".

What does matter is your relationship with your son. And that's all you need to be concerned with. NC NC NC! No amount of "impression management" is going to impress a P. You're spinning your wheels trying, imo.

Raspberries · Guest

Thanks for your opinions,

I'm NOT trying to impress him though!. The whole point of the blog is about allowing him to see our son's life for HIM, so that I don't have to tell him directly myself...*I* don't have to speak to him this way unless it's urgent.

I couldn't give a rats bum about what he thinks of the site or whatever, just as long as it cuts down on the amount I have to tell him directly.

ljleedom · Joined: 20 Feb 2007 Posts: 58 Location: Connecticut

Have you been court ordered to provide info?
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LJL
ljleedom@aol.com