Psychopath and Narcissist Survivors Support Group

femfree · Site Admin Joined: 11 Feb 2007 Posts: 667

Hi Sam. Here is an interesting question from J.

My ex-husband is an NPD--he left our marriage when our children were very young (daughter 4 years, son 6 months.) We moved 2500 miles away from him, which was a good thing; the children only saw him 5-10 days per year. My daughter is now 19, and has no desire to continue her (already limited) relationship with her father--but she is wondering about continuing a limited relationship with his family.

The problem is that they have only heard her father's "confabulated" version of her entire life. She does not want a relationship with these family members if it is based upon the confabulation that her father has provided for them. The family members do not have a close relationship with her father, either, but I am sure they have never considered NPD or the confabulation that goes along with NPDs.

Should she even try to explain "her" side of the story of her life? Would there be any&nbs p;benefit for her in "unconfabulating" her life to these family members--a sort of "setting the record straight"? Or is it best to just let them go, too? Thanks.
_________________
Nothing is easier than to denounce the evildoer;
nothing is more difficult than to understand him.
Fyodor Dostoevsky

samvaknin · Joined: 15 Feb 2007 Posts: 2186

I don't know these other "family members", so how can I provide you with an intelligent and helpful response?

Abuse by Proxy

http://samvak.tripod.com/abuse11.html

Narcissistic and psychopathic parents and their children - click on the
links:

Nothing is Happening at Home

http://gorgelink.org/vaknin/wronghome-en.html

Genetics and Personality Disorders

http://samvak.tripod.com/personalitydisorders27.html

The Genetic Underpinnings of Narcissism

http://samvak.tripod.com/journal43.html

Narcissism at a Glance

http://samvak.tripod.com/narcissismglance.html

How Can I Save My Child from the Narcissist or Psychopath?

http://samvak.tripod.com/4.html

Narcissistic Parents

http://samvak.tripod.com/faq5.html

The Narcissist's Dead Parents

http://samvak.tripod.com/faq54.html

Parenting - The Irrational Vocation

http://samvak.tripod.com/parent.html

The Narcissist's Mother

http://samvak.tripod.com/faq64.html

The Prodigy as Narcissistic Injury

http://samvak.tripod.com/journal89.html

Leveraging the Children

http://samvak.tripod.com/abuse12.html

Tell Your Children the Truth

http://samvak.tripod.com/abuse13.html

The Narcissist and His Family

http://samvak.tripod.com/faq22.html

The Cult of the Narcissist

http://samvak.tripod.com/journal79.html

Narcissist, Beware the Children

http://samvak.tripod.com/journal36.html

The Narcissist as Eternal Child

http://samvak.tripod.com/journal92.html

The Inverted Narcissist

http://samvak.tripod.com/faq66.html

Intimacy and Abuse

http://samvak.tripod.com/intimacyabuse.html

The Narcissist is Looking for a Family

http://samvak.tripod.com/journal5.html

Adolescent Narcissist

http://samvak.tripod.com/case01.html

Portrait of the Narcissist as a Young Man

http://samvak.tripod.com/journal22.html

The Delusional Way Out

http://samvak.tripod.com/journal42.html

The Development of the Narcissist

http://samvak.tripod.com/faq25.html

The Dual Role of the Narcissist's False Self

http://samvak.tripod.com/faq48.html

The Roots of Pedophilia

http://samvak.tripod.com/pedophilia.html

The Butterflies are Laughing

http://gorgelink.org/vaknin/butterflies-en.html

Janusz Courts Dina

http://gorgelink.org/vaknin/janus-en.html

Take care.

Sam