Psychopath and Narcissist Survivors Support Group

What's the Worst That Could Happen? Letting Go...
Category 1: Some people fear they will not like their integrated selves if they let the SDBs go.
I will find out I am a person I couldn't like.
I will be dumb and incompetent after all.
I won't have warmth to communicate. I'll be cold and unfeeling.
I will be weak and vulnerable.
I will not be up to the task of coping with life.
I will be inadequate-- verbally, intellectually, emotionally, and physically.
I will find I have no inner self. I am afraid I will find my entire self is full of SDBs.
I will find a person full of hate.
I will find an untrustworthy person.
I will be unattractive.
I will be unable to control my emotions: anger, sadness, loneliness, happiness.
I will find a sex maniac within myself.
I will find a person lacking in common sense.
I will find a person unable to handle responsibility.
I will find a person unable to change.
I will find out I am a hideous person.
I will find a mentally ill person.
I will be frigid.
I will be compatible with the rest of society.
I will find a conformist.
I will be lazy.
I will find a person who likes being bad.

Category 2: Some people fear they will become too vulnerable if they do not use their SDB patterns.
Others will lose respect for me and will disapprove and reject me.
I fear that if I drop my SDBs, I will hurt so much over what I have done in the past I won't be able to handle it.
I fear I will lose the security I now have.
Demands will be put on me I can't handle.
If others do not want me around, I will be so lonely I will not be able to cope with it.
I will be terribly hurt if I do not hold myself back.
Someone will see my true feelings and take advantage of me.
Responsible living will be too heavy, and I will not like it or be able to cope with it satisfactorily.
I will do things to drive away people who are important to me.
I will be stuck with whom I find and will be unable to change.
God will condemn me.
I will mess up the future.
I will be caught forever in deep depressions with no way to get out.
I will look foolish.
I won't be able to control my own time.
I will have no control over wrong things I will say.
People will ridicule me, and I will have no satisfactory way to handle this.
I fear I will die a horrible death.
I will be lost forever.
I will be shut away in an institution.
I do not know what will happen, but I fear it will be bad.
Unknowingly I will damage others.
It will disturb my family relationships too much.
Category 3: Some people will have generalized fears about going down the non-SDB road.
I fear the non-SDB route will be more difficult than the defeating route.
The non-SDB route is more risky than the defeating one.
I'll have to pay even higher prices to give up my SDB pattern. (Cudney, 1975:21-23)


Revised: February 13, 2003
Nancy L. Spoolman

http://spoolman.com/sdaeop4/anythingcouldhappen.html

Exploring some of the reasons people fear letting go of self-sabotaging behaviour.