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When does it stop hurting?
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movedon
Site Admin


Joined: 12 Jul 2007
Posts: 814
PostPosted: Wed Dec 26, 2007 7:34 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote
You will hun you have the right attitude already
Hugs
Movedon
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kayp
member


Joined: 22 Oct 2007
Posts: 22
Location: UK
PostPosted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 10:13 am    Post subject: Reply with quote
Hi all, just a quick update. I'm doing really well but took a step back last night when I dreamt about him. In my dream we met at a party. He was still married but we left together and he spent the night with me. When we kissed goodbye he had a guilt trip and pulled away.
I know this seems trivial, but it's upset me the fact that he's invaded my dreams. x
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movedon
Site Admin


Joined: 12 Jul 2007
Posts: 814
PostPosted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 6:58 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote
Hi Kay good to hear from you, it isn't trivial because it upset you.
It is normal although it is like they sneaked back into your private space.
The main thing is your moving forwards
I hope you get past this upset Kay and don't let it get you too down Hun
Hugs
Movedon
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hello kitty
member


Joined: 01 Jan 2008
Posts: 7
PostPosted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 2:24 am    Post subject: Reply with quote
deleted by author

Last edited by hello kitty on Fri Apr 11, 2008 5:05 pm; edited 1 time in total
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kayp
member


Joined: 22 Oct 2007
Posts: 22
Location: UK
PostPosted: Thu Jan 17, 2008 4:36 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote
Hi movedon & kitty, thanks for your support. My dream has faded and last weekend I had a 'wash that man right out of my hair' day!!

I threw away letters, cards and... wait for it .... my wedding dress!!! Wow, how empowering is that? Can't believe how good that felt, another step along the road I go. xx
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movedon
Site Admin


Joined: 12 Jul 2007
Posts: 814
PostPosted: Thu Jan 17, 2008 5:31 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote
Wayyyyyyyy to go, so proud of you Kay, sounds all positive to me Kay well done, you made my day.
Hugsssssssssss
Movedon
xxxxxxxxx
and remember on difficult days were here for you Very Happy
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kayp
member


Joined: 22 Oct 2007
Posts: 22
Location: UK
PostPosted: Sun Jan 27, 2008 2:47 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote
Hi eclypz, thank you for your wonderful insight into the dreams, I beleive you are right and it is something that my spirit is coming to terms with. My heart swelled reading your post, I do feel really lucky, I needed to be reminded of that. I have occasional sad days, but I don't think that is the loss of him, it's sadness at his loss of never knowing love. It's heartbreaking. x
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kayp
member


Joined: 22 Oct 2007
Posts: 22
Location: UK
PostPosted: Sun Mar 30, 2008 5:35 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote
Hi all, I've not posted in a while as I'm feeling stronger each day and enjoying life again, but today has fazed me a little. My daughter has just returned from her fortnightly visit to her dad and she tells me the places they all go at the weekends, which normally doesn't bother me. This weekend he took our daughter and his new wife to the restaurant we visited regularly and made our own. It's upset me more than I care to admit as it feel as if he's introducing her to our past life. Am I being over sensitive, after all what does it matter? I don't want it to still hurt! Crying or Very sad
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plink
member


Joined: 17 Feb 2007
Posts: 116
PostPosted: Mon Mar 31, 2008 1:26 am    Post subject: Reply with quote
It's not at all over-sensitive of you. It's totally understandable-I think if it HADN'T phased you, that would've been weird. I don't know how old your daughter is, but if she's not a little kid, would it be out of the question for her to not report this kind of thing to you?
Your x isn't necessarily doing this to be mean-I mean he could be, but personally, it never ceases to amaze me how obtuse some men (no offense to the guys on here, it's just an observation) can be. And that's before you even add narcissism into the equation. It probably never even occured to him this might bother you, not that it would've changed his plans... Because you're not being overly sensitive, he's being insensitive. Just one more reason to be glad he's not your problem anymore.
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kayp
member


Joined: 22 Oct 2007
Posts: 22
Location: UK
PostPosted: Tue Apr 01, 2008 12:45 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote
Hi Plink, my daughter is 11 but as her Dad left me while I was expecting her she has no knowledge of our life together. She doesn't normally say much about her visits there, so I suppose she had no idea that I knew which restaurant she was talking about.

You are quite right, I should be glad that he's not my problem anymore. Thank you. x
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smith01285
member


Joined: 31 May 2008
Posts: 12
PostPosted: Sat May 31, 2008 6:14 am    Post subject: Reply with quote
im just starting the healing process. (i think...) lol

to be honest, im not sure it ever ends. youve dealt with this for 18 years and its gonna take a while for the pain to go away.

i wish you lots of luck with it, and i hope the pain goes away sooner than later.
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kayp
member


Joined: 22 Oct 2007
Posts: 22
Location: UK
PostPosted: Thu Jun 05, 2008 1:15 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote
Hi Smith, thanks for reading my post and your best wishes. I can confirm that things do get easier, although never totally disappear!

If you are just starting the healing process I wish you sucess, because you will get there, I promise. x
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