Psychopath and Narcissist Survivors Support Group

Summer · member Joined: 15 Feb 2007 Posts: 923

Today S-19 came to visit me and he commented on the N,s poor financial situation to me saying his father was now broke and I said "Well maybe your father should not have quit his job and don't you wonder where he got the money to live of off for the last year when he had no salary coming in?"
S-19 then told me that his N father has been recieving money all along this whole time from S-19's Aunt ,aka-N,s sister.(a major "N" herself).

This explains ALOT~I knew it!!
In the year 2000,when I dropped the first divorce (still beating myself up over that), N cashed out ALL of our stock options in the amount of half a million dollars,and then the money disappeared into thin air. (I did not discover this until around 2002 when I found the tax transcripts-when N accidentally left the home office unlocked).
When I questioned N, he went ballistic and told me it was "none of my damn business",,,nice huh.
This was an ongoing argument for the next several years until I filed for divorce in 2005..
I then assumed he sent this money to his sister in another state to hide it for him.I have no idea if she invested it or what account it was put in but later I found an account with her and the N's name on it that they shared together-but this money was not there.
Now I believe this is absolutely true and after N quit his job last year, his sister started sending N the hidden money from 2000 back to him.

Questions~I want to bring this issue up in court to prove financial abuse and possibly be compensated, but mostly to hold N accountable;and really just to seek some answers and get some closure.

1.Do you think it is worth it to do this?
2.Is this issue too far past (money hidden from the year 2000, eight years ago), and the courts won't allow it because it was too long ago?
3.Can I prove just by subpeoned bank records of the N,that this money was hidden and then given back to the N?
4.Will proving financail abuse even make a difference in the settlement/outcome of my case?
5.Is it worth the legal fees to have the N take a deposition, and even subpeona N,s sister's financial accounts?

If N is claiming he is now broke, then he already spent it all, but there is still a retirement account to divide and if I prove N hid asesttss,he would have to pay me back out of the 401k.

Actually I think there are alot more secrets regarding finances that N is STILL hiding since N is refusing to disclose his finances.

Has anyone else's N done this, been completely financially abusive,lied about his real salary,blamed you for spending too much (when you were pinching pennies all along),used their own family members to help them hide money, kept all financial matters secret,and maliciosly cash out marital asetts and hide them from you??I mean this was even going on DURING the marraige with the N here, and also the N was always spending way out of control buying things for himself.

Summer

vmm · member Joined: 07 Aug 2007 Posts: 186

What does your attny say?

Summer · member Joined: 15 Feb 2007 Posts: 923

Vmm,

So you don't think I should ask my Attorney to just deposition the N, under oath?
Since it is such a large sum involved , I am willing to pay to have this done.
We have already subpeoned alot of financials,all bank accounts and records, including 2007 taxes-maybe the taxes will show the money trail and how it came from N,s sister.
Remember, I found out N paid 30 grand in taxes for the year 2007 (when he had quit and had NO salary coming in).
N still hasn't submitted anything yet and court is not until July 17th, 2008.

Summer

Stand4Change · member Joined: 09 May 2008 Posts: 67

I dn't see how a depo will give you any leverage. He'll just lie.

Sounds like it would take a lot of evdience to prove this crazy story. If he won't produce paperwork, then have your attorney subpoena it directly from wherever you can. Have your attorney document every contact in a letter, push for release of the records, and don't wait--File a motion for production (threaten this first in a demand letter, then make good on the threat of no response is received within the requested timeframe). Expect the judge may not understand the evidence. You will have to tie this all together neatly for it to be understood and acted upon. You will also have to be clear what remedy you are seeking.

Now, if you get your solid proof, evidence that will hold up to the judge's scrutiny, then maybe a depo would scare him into settling, if your attorney gets him to blow it while being recorded. Don't expect this to work, sound too much like detective t.v. An expert may be needed to testify in court. This could cost a lot, for them to analyze and testify maybe ten grand.

Your attorney is going ot hav eto be very aggressive. Good luck.
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1ablueprincess · member Joined: 07 Oct 2007 Posts: 195

Summer our Ns are sooooo much alike!! Remeber the $400,000 I have been complaining about that my N cheated me out of in our divorce? Well, this was from a business deal he started 5 years before our divorce and NEVER told me about! Anyway, in California you have 1 year after discovery of fraud to take him to court about it. Right now it sounds like you have a lot to prove. In my opinion you should act like you dont know anything or even suspect anything about this right now (ie make sure that there is NO written record of you suspecting this). As time goes by try to gather as much evidence as you can about this and when you have him nailed to the wall on it (and he cant lie his way out) THEN take him to court about it and make a stink about it.
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