Psychopath and Narcissist Survivors Support Group

pmcnallyhealer · Joined: 18 Mar 2008 Posts: 2

Healing Intimacy

When a person experiences a trauma, they sometimes put up blocks to being close to other people because they feel embarrassed, or fear that if they show any amount of vulnerability, they will be open to being hurt again. Neither of these things are real, they are a concept based out of attachment to the past. However, they definately feel real. TO over come these things we need to look at a bigger view of reality. All are One. All is One energy, the energy of Love, and anything that isn't Love is an illusion. Feeling embarrassed is an old paradigm that we no longer need. If you want Love in your life, give Love to others. Allow them to experience you and see you in your entirety. If they judge you, know that it is just a part of themselves crying out for Love. Release the fear of your friends and Loved ones running away from you if you let them in. They will show you as much compassion as they can. Being hurt is also based out of your perception. If you tell somebody something about yourself and they say "That's stupid", know that they aren't calling you stupid. They are hiding from something from their past that they think is stupid and they are projecting it on to you. You are a compassionate being of the Love and Light and you can send Love back to them at this point to heal whatever they are struggling with.

Know you are Beautiful and you Deserve Everything. It is your Divine Birthright! Let Love in and it will Heal your life =)

Light and Love and Healing to you all,
-Patrick Arden McNally
http://www.thehealingpathduluth.com/

lightinthetunnel · Joined: 21 Mar 2008 Posts: 3

I have give all my love to a Narc which paradoxically has achieved the opposite effect. The more care, love, support she received the worst she became. I do not feel embarrassed and I do not have problems to make contact with others.

Contrary to your notion, I do not think that I, or others should just deserve anything. One must work for it.

Love is not a static concept, it is a verb. I love but I should not expect anything in return. A difficult way to build a relationship...

Especially when one gets sucked dry, and taken for a ride in a Narcissistic fantasy world.

baby_kay · Joined: 05 Mar 2008 Posts: 135

True concepts,
I have something to add to both. When you have given, and loved and sucked dry by the N, you do need to realize that the only one you MUST give love to is YOU. On the road to recovery from N relatives, spouses, children, and parents, there does come a time, when you can no longer just be the giving tree, the N supply. It is kinda a low, point when ones heart becomes, still. It is within that moment when we will need to grasp the concept that giving love freely is all we can do. What someone else does with it, is their business. If you give, freely, and someone (N's) use it to hurt you, then you know that they can not and should not be the receiver of the love supply that you need to help yourself to grow. There are only two decisions, or choices, 1- give morre and feel worse, 2- give the love freely, and know that what they do with it, is a direct projection of how they feel about themselves, and you. Misery loves company, and if they bring you down that low, they have their supply again. Every person no matter how bad, or how long they have been dealing with a person in their life, that is N, does get to this place. EMPTY. SO,.....where to go from there.....to fill back up. Oh, sure, while empty you feel, hurt, used, ashamed, etc. but then, in that same moment, there is more to life than that. We can only go as long as we can go, and then we have to turn it back around, look inside of us, and know that we deserve, love and kindness. IT IS OUR BIRTHRIGHT. If we can give it....we should get it. OK, so not from these engergy vampires, but from the good and honest people that walk around right in front of us every day. The switch can go off. The heart can stop giving to those who do not regard the love as precious. If you want it, give it. If you give it, you can get it. The amazing circle of life. It starts with YOU and ends up at YOU. When you look at this like that, you can find more and more reasons to do what you want with whom you want. No one placed any of us here to be kicked and treated like crap. NO ONE. No one says you have to take it, time and time again. What you will and will not take is yours. OWN it, and move on. Find your own love, joy, happiness from the real and true source, YOU. "No one can make you feel inferior, with out your permission", remember you give someone permission to not treat you well. They can try to take, but you decide if they get it. Peace to all, Happy Easter, hang in there. I am having a quite Easter without the N's of my extended family. It is refreshing to just be......for that I am thankful. Silence is golden, when used for the right and just purposes.
Baby kay

pmcnallyhealer · Joined: 18 Mar 2008 Posts: 2

Life is effortless. Sure you have to take steps to your goals, but you Deserve everything. It is yours. Working for stuff and making it hard is an old concept of the old fear based world which we have stepped out of. Now we live in a world based out of Love and manifestation. Research the Law of attraction, this will show you how you deserve and can have everything effortlessly =)

Light and Love and Healing to you,
-Patrick Arden McNally

baby_kay · Joined: 05 Mar 2008 Posts: 135

Another good book, and concept is "The Dark Side of the Light Chasers: by Debbie Ford, "reclaiming your power, creativity, brilliance and dreams. It is very good and has a good message. The subject of projection is good also. Anything that can show a person how to stop letting others treat them badly. All the clinical research and diagnosis, can not mend someones who has had their heart ripped out. People who have disorders, personality and others, make the good loving people of the world their victims. It is time to stop this mess. No one deserves to be treated any differently than with love. No N should have a hold on someone even their child, adult or otherwise. I would like to see a movement when, others in young childrens lives can be straight when they see someone abusing kids. (Emotionally and otherwise) A unity of peoples of sorts. I would like to see common sense come back to people. I would like to see the golden rule mean something again. I would love to know that for every person who stepped up to the plate to help another, out of love, be helped back in return. I would love to see people start giving a damn and caring to love and treat their families like they matter. I pray everyday at some point there would be a great shift of energy and for people to care. Not use, abuse, and waste others. Even N need to take responsibility for their selfish and demeaning behaviours and finally get some much needed help. I urge everyone to stand up for themselves, and not take it anymore, and then the small energy shift in one person would reach out for miles and miles. Thats what I wish for at night.
Peace