Psychopath and Narcissist Survivors Support Group

christal-Clear · Joined: 16 Feb 2007 Posts: 3 Location: UK

Hi all

I used to post on the old board under another name and I have been trying to piece my life together 6 months after the PN tried to end my life with his bare hands...and I have moved on and I'm quiet happy I have had a few dates but I don't really want to get involved with a full time guy just yet so I am having a bit of fun and going out and meeting new people and I have made some new friends too so life does get better...

BUT although I have had no contact since January the ex Psycho Narc rings and leaves a message about once a month asking about the dogs or how I am and can we talk and catch up etc? I always ignor and never reply DO THEY EVER GIVE UP?

I was told that he has moved in with a new woman (who doesn't know his past that he is a woman beater and a user)...I was quite churned up when I heard he had moved in with a new lady and felt sort of jealous that maybe he has changed and she will get the good side and maybe his anger management will stop him battering women now etc etc..

But as he called me on Sunday on my old mobile that I don't use and he left a message this proves that they don't change, how can he move in a womans house and call me?? when I have had nothing to do with him for 6 months and no contact for 3 months?...I worry for her that she will get hurt and if she has kids god help them as he tries to control them as well he is a nasty piece of work but very charming as they all are!

On a lighter note it is great that this board is still going, I miss the bits down the left hand side that told me more info on what Psychos and Narcs do, but it is great that the oldies are still here and the newies have found us.

I will post this on both as I always read both and he was a big mixture of Psycho/Narco lol.
Any tips greatly recieved.
_________________
Chris x

"People will forget what you said... People will forget what you did... But People will never forget how you made them feel..." Maya Angelou

Cookie2 · Joined: 28 Feb 2007 Posts: 1378

Hi....The only thing that changes for an p is the victim.....nothing else changes....the p is STILL a P Embarassed

The abusive P is STILL AN ABUSER Embarassed

The cheating P IS STILL A CHEATER Embarassed

The lying p is STILL a LIAR...The Con is STILL A CON Embarassed

The Ass is STILL AN ASS Embarassed

Only the victim changes....I proved that....As for the links that were once on the left...the managers here worked very hard to move them over here and they can now be found at the bottom of the index page....many new ones have been added as well since the old msn board.Welcome back Laughing

_________________
I have a photographic memory....I just don't have same day service.....................Cookie

stillbreathing · Joined: 30 Mar 2007 Posts: 286

femfree · Site Admin Joined: 11 Feb 2007 Posts: 667

HI Chris. Good to see you here. The old site is still around and it's a 'read only' site as MSN is having huge server problems - are they closing???

You can still click there - most of the info has been tranferred here.
http://www.msnusers.com/psychopath

You take care and glad to see you so strong in blocking the P.
_________________
Nothing is easier than to denounce the evildoer;
nothing is more difficult than to understand him.
Fyodor Dostoevsky

christal-Clear · Joined: 16 Feb 2007 Posts: 3 Location: UK

Ahh thank you for that and I will look at the links.. yes I know it is a matter of time before she gets the full force of his violence and womanising ways as I had to have him arrested and still have scars from what he did to me and found out after that he has a history of it even the strangulation techniches were the same... me and his ex actually compared notes!!!

I was with him 10 months before he first hit me but there were verbal rages and temper tantrums before that..Then lots of nice times too which always made me forgive him..I got battered 2 more times after that and the last one I had to literally fight for my life he beat me up and kicked me in the head then his dog bit him so I could get up ( even his dog didn't like him lol) but then he held me down and he was choking me to death and I could feel myself slipping away and dyeing (even my dad flashed into my head and he had been dead 20 years) I thought I was going to join my dad in heaven as we was so close when I was little he proctected me from my N mum, I think he was my angel that helped save me so with all my strength I kicked Psycho off me and escaped it was terrifying I felt like I was watching it happen to someone else at the time..

It has been a long journey to recover and the emotional pain is still very raw but it's deeper down inside me now, and my confidence is coming back slowly.

I have never been with a man who has affected me this much he was everything a woman could wish for at first and the love of my life, charm,love, fun and great sex Sad

even though he didn't have alot going for him i thought I could sort him out etc and give him the love to help him have a great life and change him...God it has really made me look at myself now and why I would want to be with a man like that?? I do have an N mother so that is probably why.

Well 6 months on I am doing well in my job and all my work friends think I have done so well to recover (on the outside) as I only had one day off after it had happened...I came to work batterd and bruised, I was Green,black and blue but I told them what had happened and I needed to be with normal people even though I felt ashamed and they was so supportive I have had to be so strong I thought I would never get through it but one day at a time I did.

I have 2 great kids ( NOT his thank god) and 3 lovely dogs that have helped me get through it and the future looks bright as long as I don't romantisize him and soften towards him....and summer will be hard because last year we had a great summer together so this will be the next stage I suppose so I have to remember the bad stuff and this has helped me keep it real due to his phone call!!

I value every day and value every morning that I wake up free and safe.

I am soon going to volunteer to help victims of domestic violence in the UK and be a victims support helper part time as I feel I would like to give something back to those who helped me..

This board really opened my eyes and helped to save my life and educate me that evil men do exist not just in the movies.

Thanks Wink

_________________
Chris x

"People will forget what you said... People will forget what you did... But People will never forget how you made them feel..." Maya Angelou

samvaknin · Joined: 15 Feb 2007 Posts: 2186

Hi,

These may be of help - click on the links:

The Narcissist's Victims

http://samvak.tripod.com/faq38.html

Victim Reactions

http://samvak.tripod.com/personalitydisorders70.html

Mourning the Narcissist

http://samvak.tripod.com/faq68.html

The Three Forms of Closure

http://samvak.tripod.com/abuse17.html

Back to La-la Land

http://samvak.tripod.com/journal78.html

The Spouse/Mate/Partner of the Narcissist

http://samvak.tripod.com/faq6.html

Divorcing the Narcissist and the Narcissistic Psychopath - How Do I Get Rid
of Him?

http://samvak.tripod.com/5.html

Traumas as Social Interactions

http://samvak.tripod.com/trauma.html

How Victims are Affected by Abuse

http://samvak.tripod.com/abusefamily21.html

How Victims are Affected by Abuse - Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)

http://samvak.tripod.com/abusefamily22.html

How Victims are Affected by Abuse - Recovery and Healing

http://samvak.tripod.com/abusefamily23.html

Surviving the Narcissist

http://samvak.tripod.com/faq80.html

The Inverted Narcissist - Codependence and Relationships with Abusive
Narcissists

http://samvak.tripod.com/faq66.html

Codependence and the Dependent Personality Disorder

http://samvak.tripod.com/personalitydisorders22.html

The Dependent Patient - A Case Study

http://samvak.tripod.com/personalitydisorders56.html

Danse Macabre - Trauma bonding and the Stockholm Syndrome

http://samvak.tripod.com/abusefamily.html

The Cult of the Narcissist

http://samvak.tripod.com/journal79.html

Take care.

Sam

Kathryann · Joined: 16 Feb 2007 Posts: 72

My ex-P husband with with another woman 8 days after he left me. He managed to go into a treatment center and meet a girl who let him move in with her and her four children. Things did not go well there either. He just did what he did with me, but I always got the impression or he gave me the impression that she was SO much better than I was, and that she was the one he really wanted, all those little things to keep your mind screwed up.