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Sam Vaknin is the author of "Malignant Self-love: Narcissism Revisited" and 8 other books about personality disorders and abuse in relationships with narcissists and psychopaths. He is the owner and moderator of support forums and the first person to have written about the Narcissistic Personality disorder (NPD) online (in 1997). He invented many of the terms currently used to describe the disorder and its effects on family, the workplace, and in various professions.

Where to go to ask Dr. Sam questions. This is intended as Questions to Dr. Vaknin and his responses

** Please do not post replies in this forum. This forum is for Dr. Vaknin ONLY to answer questions. Any general discussion posts WILL be deleted without warning.**

Moderators: WindSong, samvaknin

help

Postby honolulu » Sat Aug 02, 2014 4:56 am

My husband is a psychiatrist. He played the gas lighting /ambient abuse game on me and my daughter for 15 years. I was sedated, made sick, had all my personal items stolen or broken. Had my stuff taken and then returned years later. Until I played your video for my daughter and myself did everything come together and I started standing up for myself and my daughter. He did use other people to abuse, he did try triggers, but I see those for what they are and don't respond. He cut my hair, pluck my brows, dropped stuff on me at night when I was sleeping. My cash or keys, car registration or cell phone may be gone when I woke up the next day. He treats veterans. He threaten to commit me, he tried to say lets get drunk, but I really don't drink. I finally left the relationship and I am pursuing divorce. The bad thing is I am dealing with him harassing me through people where I am. I was driving and someone just turn there car right into mine. I felt the week I was talking to him about temp and perm. support, it seems that the car incident happened. He has said he has bipolar (maybe unspecified). He constantly lies, he trashed the food I eat, he would back up the toilet. He seems to have no emotion, but when questioned about it he says that he has too much. He seems to not always be concerned with social graces, like what plate to eat off, correct responses to things. He seems to take great pride in control, and making me upset. He has spent tons of dollars breaking my stuff, then replace it even when I tell him its him he just shrugs it off. I thought maybe he just hated me, and this behavior would stop, but my 16 year old daughter is still going through some of this strangeness. She also was made sick, she found her hair cut one time. We both found our pants off us one time when we woke up. Are you seeing a personality disorder here? He didn't fix his 28,000 dollar car when the engine light when on. He seems to not want anybody to hear about his weirdness. Will my daughter and I get through this ok, how far will an individual like this go? He is messed up and trying to avoid alimony? His mom didn't show him emotion. He never met his real dad. One of his father drank alot and abused verbally him and his brothers. Out of four brothers, only one will still be married. Help me understand. :ty:
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Re: help

Postby samvaknin » Thu Aug 14, 2014 5:40 pm

What' your question???
Encyclopedia of Narcissism and Psychopathy:

http://www.narcissistic-abuse.com/siteindex.html

Buy 16 books or 3 video DVDs about narcissists, psychopaths, and abusive relationships - click on this link:

http://www.narcissistic-abuse.com/thebook.html
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