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In search of a cure for narcissism

Sam Vaknin is the author of "Malignant Self-love: Narcissism Revisited" and 8 other books about personality disorders and abuse in relationships with narcissists and psychopaths. He is the owner and moderator of support forums and the first person to have written about the Narcissistic Personality disorder (NPD) online (in 1997). He invented many of the terms currently used to describe the disorder and its effects on family, the workplace, and in various professions.

Where to go to ask Dr. Sam questions. This is intended as Questions to Dr. Vaknin and his responses

** Please do not post replies in this forum. This forum is for Dr. Vaknin ONLY to answer questions. Any general discussion posts WILL be deleted without warning.**

Moderators: WindSong, samvaknin

In search of a cure for narcissism

Postby Sarah Jane » Sun May 11, 2014 1:18 pm

Thanks Sam, I appreciate all the work you are doing on these personality disorders. In my own search for healing from a life, that has only known narcissistic abuse, I have come across a therapy, which made so much sense in dealing with my own hurt and dysfunction. This also triggered me, after reading so many books, including yours on the subject of narcissism etc., into thinking this type of therapy might have at least a chance of unraveling a little the tight grip the false self has on such persons. The therapy I'm talking about is, "Internal family systems therapy,, or (IFS) therapy" developed By dr. Richard Schwartz P.H.D
http://www.selfleadership.org/about-int ... stems.html
Richard Schwartz believes the personality is made up of a core self and then sub personalities as opposed to the normal psychological theory that the personality is a single entity. These sub personalities are supposed to report to the core self in a normal functioning person. However through childhood abuse neglect trauma etc. these sub personalities who are all well-meaning actually sometimes take over the leadership role almost banished the core self for its own good into exile. Kind of like when the president of the United States is taken to a secret location at a time of great danger. Anyway with this type of therapy the therapist helps the individual to explore and find out why these many sub personalities may be counteracting each other and causing dysfunction. In other words getting to the bottom of the problem by talking to each part (sub personality) individually (the same as a therapist would talk to real members of a dysfunctional family) and asking the part or parts a for reasons why it is performing in such a way. Trying to come up with solutions that make the dysfunctional part relax a little. Instilling confidence in these parts that this core self can do it's job. The only thing that makes me a bit hesitant to believe this type of therapy would help is the fact that you say the true self or core self is atrified and unable to take over any more. I would like your comments on this. Thanks!
Sarah Jane
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Re: In search of a cure for narcissism

Postby samvaknin » Sat May 24, 2014 10:25 am

This "multiple personality" approach is only likely to exacerbate pathological narcissism, not ameliorate it. The narcissist needs to INTEGRATE, not NEGOTIATE. The False Self does not tolerate competition and will likely feel threatened. The True Self is atrophied and infantile and, indeed, cannot be trusted with adult chores.

These may be of help - click on the links:





Healing and Curing Narcissism











Does the Narcissist Have a Multiple Personality (Dissociative Identity Disorder)?

http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/na ... ssage/4950
Encyclopedia of Narcissism and Psychopathy:


Buy 16 books or 3 video DVDs about narcissists, psychopaths, and abusive relationships - click on this link:

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