Psychopath and Narcissist Survivors Support Group

Hello once again

I was wonderful if there were any other men on this board that have experienced emotional abuse at the hands of a female narcissist? Surely, I can't be the only one. All the postings I read seem to be predominately about male narcissism. Would really appreciate he opportunity to share some thoughts and compare notes with other men out so that I feel as though I am not the only one :(

Rob

Hi, eraserhead, I'm sure there are a few around. However, more immediately, you might want to have a look at the ACON section of these boards, where there are men dealing with N females, albeit family members (mothers, usually). In terms of the tactics used by them, and how it feels as a man to be on the receiving end of their behavior, if not about being in a relationship with a female N.

Thinking about it, I wonder whether female Ns concentrate their behavior on their children, once married.
I suspect my N mom entrapped my father into marriage by the usual seduction techniques described by so many on here, regardless of gender. He was vulnerable when they met, whirlwind courtship, marriage a surprise to all, she alienated the rest of his family one by one, and then his few friends, yada yada.

It was only once I found this forum after breakup with XN that I realised my mother was also N.

There are a few here, but rarely stick around. This is definitely a more female board, but the healing is the same. I am sure we can help you just as we help anyone else. Also, if you do a search in the NPD forum under "female" - you may be surprised to find a story or two that resembles yours.

Funny - I went to my weekly visit to Love Blog this morning and found this. Perhaps you will find it helpful.

http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2009/10/29/letters-to-lovefraud-vigorous-campaign-to-portray-me-as-angry-and-hostile/

Rob,

I don't participate in this forum as much as I once did, but I'm a male who nearly married a female narcissist. Feel free to peruse all of my past posts and to ask me any questions. I'll do what I can to help. All my best...

Hi,


I was a victim of a female narcissist/borderline. I have been No Contact for almost a year and a half and she is still relentless in her quest to suck me back in.

I have not yielded once, and my soul has remained sane because of that.

The girl I was with (and am currently evading) is a textbook example of a Cluster B personality disorder. I'm sure there is some good information to be exchanged... Feel free to ask me any questions and do a search for my previous posts - lots of stuff in there, even if it is just 'a -ha' moments... sometimes the best info is to know that we are not alone and that others here have walked in these shoes too.

And listen to Knoxy, she can certainly whip some sense out of the thickest, sickest fog

just joined. looking for some good advice.
my son exgirlfriend, I am sure is a narcissist. As a family we have almost been destroyed. My son arrested twice for " trying to kill her" . Both times charges dropped, no evidence of course, just lies. I was accused of attacking my grandson, again untrue, she had . She called me a child abuser one week and the next asked me to look after him as I was the only one she trusted. Crazy ! Again police did not take further. The latest I am accused of stealing from my workplace, another attack fron the N . Luckily again this can be disproved.
When they first met my son had a fantastic job. That is now gone, she made sure of that. The money is gone. And now her also with the children they had.
The extent of her lies never ceases to surprise me. I have in the past tried to get her help but of course she says there is nothing wrong with her, it is everyone else that is mad.
She has been in and out of hospital, faking fits, accusing health workers of attacking her etc. Makes up wonderful stories, which you know immediately are not true, but at the beginning were relatively harmless.She repeatedly complains to authorities and police of persecution just to hurt people. She shows no remorse. She can attack you one day and the next turn on the charm, smile sweetly and act as if nothing has happened.
She is extremely beautiful in looks and flirts around all men, even as old as men in seventies, is always perfectly presented, and it seems is able to manipulate anyone, police, health visitors and even child protection services. Amazing ! She has been monitored with the children by professionals, but cleverly hid her nasty side while they were around. The case has now been closed.
I have been advised to get a non molestation order against her, but if I do then as a family we lose contact with the children. My son has been advised to stay away as police expect that he will be accused again. The children are not safe. We are not safe.
Everyone says just walk away, and believe me that would be easy, if not for her best weapon, the children.
Her own family dont want to know her, saying she almost destroyed them. I believe narcissists are dangerous and should be treated like any other criminal.
I know this all sounds a bit mixed up, but this is the state of my head at the moment, dont know who to turn to. Help

I was involved with one - you can search for my posts if you like. And there was a short thread similar to this one earlier this year where several others jumped in.

I was a victim, and am becoming a survivor, of a female narcissist. This was not a romantic relationship. Rather, it was a mentorship turned into a tormentorship. I'd be happy to share with you the traits and tendencies of my tormentor. I am a female, so I will only be able to give you my female perpsective about this, but I could share with you what I know about "my" narcissist who was/is a female.

what chance does my son have in court of proving that his ex and mother of his two children is a N, and the danger she is to the children. She has already physically harmed the eldest , who is only 2 , and then told child protection services that I had done it. A week after she called me a child abuser she text me to ask if I could have my grandson for the day, saying I was the only one she trusted to look after him! Even though I was putting myself at extreme risk of another accusation I said I would. I was hoping social services might see that her behaviour was strange to say the least, but no. Luckily the police did and " case" against me were dropped. It is frightening to think that she could pinch and twist his ear( according to paediatrician) just to try to cause trouble for me. I dont care what she does to me but I want to protect my beautiful grandchildren. Her own mother has witnessed her abuse to my eldest grandchild and notified child protection..Amazingly they have done nothing, saying unless they catch her out there is nothing they can do. Of course when she knew she was being watched she behaved like the perfect mother. They have now closed the case.
I have just been cleared of stealing from my work place, another accusation from her. It was dismissed by my employers as nonsense and they have told me not to worry about it, and any help they can give me is there. Think police are finally seeing a pattern of accusations from her to my son and myself. There has now been four serious ones. I wonder if they check where she used to live if her name comes up doing the same to others , I expect so.
She has been referred to a councillor under her own admission that she makes things up in her head , twists things and becomes aggressive. Like everything here in UK it is almost a year since then and no councelling yet. She will probably refuse it anyway.
The latest is that if we go near her property she will have us "arrested"!
We know she is mentally ill , but how to prove it. The thought of leaving those beautiful children in the hands of a crazy person makes me feel sick.
Please has anyone got any good advice ?

Hey, I'm a woman but my exN was also another woman. I understand a bit of where you are coming from. When the N is a woman the N has the sexist advantage of playing the poor weak one who doesn't understand why their beloved has fled. XD; I've experienced it, and it's painful. :/ You're not alone, and I wish you luck.

That's it exactly. I couldn't think of how to sum it up, but the female narcissist can more convincingly pull off the, "What did I do? --NOTHING!" pretense. Maybe not more convincingly than a male narcissist...but certainly more easily.