Psychopath and Narcissist Survivors Support Group

40fab · Joined: 10 Mar 2007 Posts: 22

Hey Matilda!

I was writing you a response and I hit a wrong key or something - and everything got wiped out. Anyway, I'll start again. I realized that my friend was a bully. I got on the internet and began reading up on bullies and led me to the topic of narcissim. I realized that my friend had a lot of the traits and characteristics. Then I understood just what was going on and why. At that time, I had not been in contact with him. Through alot of the articles that I reading - my nest communication with him was not as difficult because I had used the tactics I had learned from the articles. You keep making it out as though I'm in some ridiculous love affair with this guy and I keep explaining to everyone that I'm not.

I'm understanding Narcissim, I'm learning about where I've been and how I've been affected. Just because I won't allow a man to kick my a-- doesn't mean that I haven't live real life. I've come a long way - I'm simply sharing optimism. I don't have all the answers and neither do you.

I just wrote to 2 members who are really suffering the end result of living with men who are N's and not kowing what to do next. I've written to them both to believe in themselves love themselves and to treasure themsleves- That's what I have to offer. That was my intention, Matilda.

No, I did'nt live with my N - nor will I ever- and rather or not I'm intimate with him at this time or anybody else is unimportant, Matilda. Like everyone else I have a story to tell and willing to give suggestions of hope and love to whomever may be in need. As far as my reading "the word" as part of my personal way of managing myself - I was ask how do I manage- cultures, and backgrounds of others is not important you ask me a question - and I gladly answered you. It seems to me that you are in charge of this board. I will apologize to you Matilda for offering help- for being understanding - and for wishing that other have some of what I have gained for myself and that is love- and overcoming the many obstacles I have endured in my life- to include dealing with a narcsiistic person.

I will follow your suggestion and relinqush my membership. I am truly sorry for misleading or confusing anyone -

Smile

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40fab

sweetcaroline51 · Joined: 16 Feb 2007 Posts: 524 Location: Canada

40fab,
don't know if you are gone or not but I wanted to write one last post to you. You suggest that perhaps N's know how far they can go and with whom? Example, yours has never been physical with you>? If you do not live together, he is in another place, then what you are saying is obvious...how can he reach you if he is not physically present? You know, a good many of us also raged back at our N's..we did not all succumb to beatings. The very fact that we tolerated what we did means there is something wrong with us too. I believe all of us victims here agree with that. So, bipolar or not, you need to take a long, good hard look in the mirror as to why you would even consider accepting this N in your life. Helping others definately does not mean preaching how 'well you handle" this lifestyle." You are so not relating to anyone on this board, I have to agree with Matilda, what were you doing her at all? Once again, more power to you and good luck.
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Caroline

40fab · Joined: 10 Mar 2007 Posts: 22

Hey sweetcaroline!
People write me back and I can tell that some of us don't read some of the post in their entire form. If you would go back and read the reply I left for Matilda - You would see what I said I thought I had to offer and why. Am I not to be included because I don't live with the man? I'm I ill informed because he lives in one county and I live in another? Isn't limited to no contact routinely suggested? There ARE reason why I have to at certain times have contact with him - And I'm not going to explain those reasons to anyone at this time. But since I do have to see him on some occaisons -the site and the articles I have read I have found different ways and tactics to deal with him. And for what I have experienced and for I what I do experience - I don't mind sharing suggestions. And thanks for reminding me that more power is to me, babe 'cause that's just what I feel whenever I must have contact with him - 'cause I get there with the upper hand - and I leave with the upper hand- why? - because I've learned and I'm learning just how he thinks and functions as an N - I have the knowledge that he's an N - he does not- knowledge is power, baby - and some of the women in our group have been left devestated and feel powerless- they are hurting and confused to the 23rd power - That's why I'm here - to share-- to let them know that thet have all the power and all the control over their own lives.

Love to ya! Laughing

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40fab

sweetcaroline51 · Joined: 16 Feb 2007 Posts: 524 Location: Canada

4oFab,
the women on this board have been devastated. And I totally respect the fact that alot of them are true survivors. They like me do not HAVE to deal with N's anymore because we think more of ourselves than that. Baby, to be truly free is to recognize that you are so much better than that!!
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Caroline

stellarwnd · Joined: 22 Feb 2007 Posts: 104 Location: California