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How Do you thing the N would react to this?
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Riccy101



Joined: 18 Feb 2007
Posts: 287
PostPosted: Sat Mar 17, 2007 8:29 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote
Hi Oaktree.

You wrote,
Quote:
One thing all the frank communication did--I think I scared her away for GOOD! Will see on the next holiday.


So do you think confronting your Nsis by using a method of frankness, delivered in such a way that showed you meant business and wasn't intimidated, made her back off?

Riccy
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Riccy101



Joined: 18 Feb 2007
Posts: 287
PostPosted: Sat Mar 17, 2007 8:49 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote
As far as my NM goes...

I have often wondered, since I know ending contact with my parents was the right thing to do, what would be so tragic about being frank with people? You have to role play something like that in your head a while...but could it be fear of stepping out of a comfort zone where we are people pleasers that makes us not want to tell it like it is???

When I picture myself confronted with my NM, I really think I would be frank about my feelings. I think she knows it too, and that's why she's stayed away. I was very frank with her before all contact ended. I don't think she wants to deal with a person she can't control by intimidation and fear.

Riccy
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oaktree



Joined: 16 Feb 2007
Posts: 362
Location: Minnesota
PostPosted: Sun Mar 18, 2007 4:02 am    Post subject: being frank Reply with quote
Yes Riccy, I do think that being straight up had alot to do with her backing off. That and telling her to take a hike.

See my other post about "this was her last ditch effort to make my head spin."
Rolling Eyes
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Riccy101



Joined: 18 Feb 2007
Posts: 287
PostPosted: Sun Mar 18, 2007 4:37 am    Post subject: Reply with quote
Hey Oaktree...

Man! I love your signature!

OK, I'm looking up your other post...

Riccy
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Onyx



Joined: 23 Mar 2007
Posts: 12
Location: Australia
PostPosted: Fri Mar 23, 2007 12:04 pm    Post subject: Should we round all the Npeople we know & put them in a room Reply with quote
It has dawned on me ,we are all the same. Children from N Parents, think and feel the same. I truelly thought I was alone. Yes you will NEVER win. N is a cognitive problem in that person's brain it is like trying to cure someone who has autism or a severe intellectual impairment.

One day, when my father is on his deathbed I plan on telling him what he really did to my life. I know it is terrible to think of him passing on but I don't even think i will ever cry for him , if I was it woukd be tears of happiness to be free from a constant living hell.

I wonder what would happen if we rounded up all the N people we new and put them in a room.perhaps WWIII hey? Razz
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sheenie2000



Joined: 16 Feb 2007
Posts: 169
Location: North Carolina
PostPosted: Fri Mar 23, 2007 7:38 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote
lol probably wwii!
why not tell your N what he did to you now? Why wait till later?
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