Psychopath and Narcissist Survivors Support Group

My N mother loved to give gifts. To everyone else and very impressive gifts at that. She put on such a show!

I find it really interesting that she gave multiple gifts to everyone else in my immediate family and usually nice things like jewelery, good clothes and or nice stuff.

She always just got me one gift, and usually a single piece of clothing, nothing more. And clothing that was nothing special. And never my style. I felt oddly insulted by her gifts. Now I know I was being insulted. She always wore very fashionable clothing and flatering jewelery, but didn't like it if I had anything special, and I am a clothes hound.

Once she gave me a tape recorder, something I wanted knowing that they were the newest tech gift. Although I took it and used it for some months, I now remember that after I stoped using it she took it and used it for herself. Then I never saw it again.

I find it interesting that I had to buy things with my own money if I were to get anything I wanted in my family. When I started making my own money and buying things for me she got pissed off. She said I was an overconsumer and a whole lot of other things which were just plain cruel.

Am I glad to read this topic and find out that Mom isn't the only one who is such a moron about giving gifts.

I refused to see her for Christmas, but my sister visited her and brought back my presents. Will you believe that they were:

*A pad of sticky notes
*A pad of that lined paper for writing grocery lists
*Cheap pens with dogs on them (I am afraid of dogs. This would be like me giving her pens with giant spiders on them)
*Socks, white ordinary Wal-mart socks
*Some plain, solid-colored t-shirts with the clearance tags still attached. They are very ugly.
*A card with a letter in it whining that I'm a horrible person for not seeing her and that she's really cool and I just don't realize it.

My sister got the exact same things, minus the whiny card.

Yes, I can concur about the crappy gifts!

My N grandmother gave me and my DH cheap Walgreens gifts for christmas. I got food storage containers and DH got a thermometer. One year I got a $5 wall clock and DH got Old Spice deoderant (at least that is what he actually uses).... the only good part, she does give money also... but only if she sees you. Last Christmas we didn't see her and I didn't see her at my birthday, and no gift, no call, nothing. You always have to come to her if you want a gift. I figure its not worth it!

My N FIL gave DH two birthday's ago a $20 Wal-Mart gift card. His birthday is in early October, the card had Santa Clause on it, and was copywritten the year before... he likes to regift, as does my grandmother. Last birthday ago, DH did not talk to his Dad, and he got nothing.... one year he gave DH some shoes he had worn a few times that he didn't want (FIL had won them in a golf tournament). DH never wore them! Oh, and the used shoes were not given to DH until he could visit his Dad about 1 month after his birthday.